Energetic Art  

A visual representation of the energy within.

We are all dying. From first breath, it could be our last. But standing in the mirror, how many of us can look upon our gaze and honestly say that we are really living?

That's the problem with having such long life expectancies now. Everybody thinks they have so much time.

My husband thought he had time. We both did. But at only 56, in four weeks, pancreatic cancer ravaged him, and he was dead. Like dead, dead. Gone.

So Unfair. We had just sold our business after years of hardwork. Early retirement, baby! We made it! Who knew that we would only get to enjoy just three short, but beautiful, months together.

I got two things from this horrific experience:

1. Death is appalling, shocking and a thief. 

&

2. Death is also a cruel teacher and I have been given a gift. I get to live. 

This is what inspires my work.

Every piece I make is a self-portrait.  The positive, the negative, the limiting and the expansive, what I send out and what I receive. Cascading, blocking, swirling, flowing, I paint what I imagine my energy must look like to examine it under a microscope. And I want to examine it. I want to study it. I want to be conscious of it, and conscientious with it. 

Perhaps it's my way of seeking control in the uncontrollable, but if everything is energy, and I believe that it is, then how can I honour the dark and the light within me and harness it? How can I become aware of, gain mastery over, and regain that which feels stolen away?  I wasn't left here on my own to merely exist, was I? 

I learned the hard way that life can change in a heartbreaking blink of the eye. I guess I wasn't taking the hint before.

I get it now. 

All my paint is going on the canvas. Every paintbrush worn out to the last bristle. My imagination squeezed dry.

What's the motivation for my work?  

I'm going to really LIVE before I die.